75 Conversation starters for couples
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Connection is powerful. When done well, connecting with others can help alleviate anxiety, reduce isolation and so much more. But what happens when we don’t feel connected to those we are closest to?
During lockdown, I struggled to feel connected to my husband. For so long we had relied on to the end-of-the-day catch up, where we filled each other in on our days, the ups, downs and hilarity that was guaranteed while we were both working as secondary school teachers (teenagers are hilarious, it’s true!) but once we were spending all day every day together, we struggled to keep the conversations flowing. Everything we experienced we did so together so there were no fun stories or grievances to share over the dinner table.
That’s when I started looking for conversation starters. We used them in drinking games, over dinner and even on nights sat in front of the TV in between episodes of Game of Thrones and Tiger King.
It was amazing to ask questions that I was sure I knew the answer to, only to have my husband come out with something completely different. It was a joy to get to know even more about him, and connect with him on a level we hadn’t previously explored.
What was even better, as lockdown ended and we started spending more time with friends and family, I found the starters helped me get to know the people around me even better too.
Here I’ve collected 75 conversation starters, from deep to more intimate, for you to use to help you connect more deeply through conversation. Some are specifically for deepening connection in a relationship, but others can be used for any time you want to strengthen your conversation skills. I invite you to try them and if you’re up for it let us know how you get on over on our Instagram page!
Conversation starters for couples:
Who do you feel you can be most honest with in your family?
What is your favourite family tradition?
What is your favourite of our traditions?
Who in your family do you admire the most?
What is your favourite memory of your parents?
What is your favourite childhood memory?
Do you get along well with your siblings? Do you wish it were different?
If you could change one thing about how you were raised, what would it be and why?
If you could apologise to one person from your past, who would it be and why?
How are you different from the person you were in school?
What is your happiest memory with me?
What is your funniest memory of me?
What do you think is your best skill?
In what circumstances, if any, is it ok to lie?
What are you most excited about in our future?
What could I take more time appreciating about you?
Describe your perfect day.
How do you think you have changed over the last 10 years?
What is the one thing you value in our relationship the most?
What would you say is your biggest insecurity?
If we were having troubles in our relationship who would you ask for help?
Have you ever read a book that has has changed how you think about life in general?
What is the strangest dream you had lately?
If you could change one thing about how we currently live, what would it be?
What do you like most about being with me?
What is the worst date you have ever been on?
Which of our dates so far have you enjoyed the most?
Would you rather be famous or rich? (You can’t be both!)
Tell me about your dream holiday and all of the activities you would do while away.
What is your most embarrassing moment?
Tell me about a film that made you cry.
What is your favourite movie of all time?
What would be your ideal date?
Would you prefer a small, cosy wedding or a big shindig?
What musical instrument do you wish you could play?
What was your favourite game to play as a child?
Would you rather go out-out or stay home?
What hobby do you wish you had more time for?
If you could start your ideal career tomorrow, what would it be?
If you could become any fictional character for a whole day who would you be and why?
If you could invite 3 famous people to a dinner party, who would you choose?
What is your favourite meal?
If you won the lottery what’s the first thing you’d buy?
If you could describe yourself in two words, what would they be?
If you got stuck on a desert island, what would you miss the most?
When was the last time you cried?
What is your worst habit?
What is the biggest risk you’ve ever taken?
Given the opportunity, would you take that risk again?
What would you say to your 16 year old self if you could go back in time?
What kind of a parent do you want to be?
What would you want your life to look like in 5 years time?
Who would you say is your best friend? Tell me your favourite thing about them.
What do you find most useful to help when you’re feeling angry?
What do you find most useful to help when you’re feeling stressed?
What do you find most useful to help when you’re feeling upset?
Do you think there is room for jealousy in a healthy relationship?
What is a deal-breaker for you in a relationship?
What is your favourite family history fact?
What is one thing you wish people would ask you about more often?
Tell me about the best gift you have ever received.
What would the title of your autobiography be?
Would you survive a zombie apocalypse?
Would you ever go on a reality TV show? If so which one?
Have you ever broken up with a friend? Why?
Intimate conversation starters for couples
When is your favourite time of the day to have sex?
What is your best intimate memory with me?
Share one thing we haven’t tried that you would like us to consider.
If you knew we wouldn’t get caught, where would you like to have sex?
Does sexy-texting turn you on?
What do you like most about my body?
What do you like most about your body?
If you could relive any of our intimate experiences, which would you choose and why?
Which sex position is most likely to make you orgasm?
What would you like to see me dressed in on a special occasion?
If you love a game, and want more conversation starters on the go try Convo and Chill, a fun, thought-provoking card game for game-nights or date-nights, or a little more conversation for a relaxed game you can play with anyone of any age.
However you choose to connect, have fun. You deserve it.